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a
13 November 2016 @ 8:15 PM


What had I ever done to deserve such treatment from you?

Initially, I tried to be cold.
You told me that being cold to you makes you sad.
I tried to be less distant.
So you'll not be sad.

But I realised you didn't really care about my feelings.
Your one sentence brought everything back.
Could have came up with something, anything.

Few weeks ago, you said you still had feelings.
Few weeks later, you had no trouble hurting someone that you like.

I thought I was stronger than this.

All I did was to be nice to you.
But all you did is hurt me.

Was I wrong for wanting to mend things up.
Was I wrong to care about your feelings.

Was I wrong for not wanting to hurt you?

Sometimes, 
I really want to tell your gf the truth.
Not that I want to get even.
Is that I feel she needs to know the truth.
About the lies you've told her.
About how you told her that you've cut contact,
but you didn't.
About the things you said to me.
About the things you hid from her.
About how you had feelings for more than one.


To know the person she invested in,
what exactly is he capable of.

But I can't bring myself to do it.
I know it's the best for your gf.
I know she deserve the truth.
I still can't do it.
Knowing that I will ruin your life.
I can't...
I won't be able to live with it..

Also, I didn't want her to feel the way I feel.
Feeling that you're not enough for a person.
Not enough, that's why he had to find another.


We were really good friends.
All the movies, debates, battling of wits, jokes,
late night talks about life and woes,
never ending laughter.
I really missed it.

What went wrong?
So wrong that we can't even be friends?


Is it naive that if you're trying,
I will try too?
Is it naive for wanting a good friend back?

I need some time to readjust before I can reply you.